Most of us are well aware October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month and the statistics are quite staggering (approx. 12% of US women will develop invasive breast cancer over the course of her lifetime). Even more alarming are the statistics regarding mental health. How many of you also knew October is National Bullying Prevention Awareness Month, National Depression Education & Awareness Month, Mental Illness Awareness Month and Emotional Wellness Month?
I believe there are few of us who could argue that no less than 100% of humans struggle with peaks and valleys in our mental wellness over the course of our lives. All of us have dark days, including me. I’m not a mental health expert or celebrity and my opinion may not hold much for many, but in a lot of ways I’m just like you. I’m a mom, wife, daughter, friend, etc. who loves life and wears an honest smile 99% of the time and who also travels through darkness on occasion.
The photo accompanying this story features a smiling, seemingly happy version of myself and was posted on Facebook in 2014, the same month I started therapy to manage a severe episode of anxiety.
At the time, my daughter was 19 months old and I was, according to most medical resources, out of the postpartum depression zone, but my anxiety had reached a peak I had never quite experienced before. My new role as a mom had triggered a tidal wave of unanticipated fear and worry – I was riddled with irrational thoughts: what if we lose her, what if she loses us, what if…
The feeling of doom was unbearably heavy. I was in emotional and physical pain and starting to feel that dark pang of helplessness when I finally broke. Fortunately, my husband was there to pick up the pieces and he quickly reminded me help was just a phone call away.
It wasn’t my first time seeing a mental health professional and it probably won’t be my last and for that, I consider myself terribly lucky.
I am lucky because I have the resources to find help.
I am lucky because I have the means to pay for help.
I am lucky because I have the support of family and friends who encourage me to seek help.
And, most importantly, I am lucky because the concepts of therapy and mental wellness are “accepted” in my world. Many Americans are not as lucky and that is what compelled me to share my story.
I believe the only solution to our nation’s current mental health crisis–the one that lacks resources and health insurance support and leads to daily suicides and mass killings, etc.–is to SPEAK out in an attempt to eliminate the stigma surrounding mental health. As a mom human, I refuse to become desensitized. I cannot stand idly by and watch as our families, communities and nation unravel.
If, by sharing my own story and making myself vulnerable to the shame and embarrassment that continues to prevent so many from standing up, speaking out and seeking help for their own mental wellness I can start a dialogue, then I’ll proudly accept any label you’d like to give me. SILENCE is a deadly weapon. I may not be able to change legislation or even begin a movement, but I would like to invite you to join me in starting a conversation with your kids, partner, friends, colleagues, neighbors, strangers… Share your story. Open your heart. Become vulnerable. Ask for help. SPEAK!
100% of Americans will stare into darkness at some point in their lifetime – what percentage are we willing to let walk in and watch disappear?
About the Author
Shelley Ouellette is native Floridian and graduate of the University of Florida, who grew up on the sand and in the waters of New Smyrna Beach. The founder of SCO Consulting, Shelley provides clients strategic communications and writing services. When she’s not typing away, you can find her enjoying the FL sun with her three-year-old daughter and husband.
